Thursday, 9 March 2017

Still Alive & Still Kicking....

It seems like forever since I have been here, I really have neglected a lot of things in my life over the past couple of years.

I'm still living with health issues, but they are mostly under control with medication. I haven't had any visits to the Emergency Department in quite a few months and I am happy for it to remain that way.

It turns out that I didn't have a heart attack after all, I have now been diagnosed with Prinzmetal Angina and the medication is keeping it under control. I have been through the Cardiac Rehab program and am now discharged from the Cardiologist. I still have to keep an eye on things, if I have a Prinzmetal attack, I have been given guidelines to go by and if they don't work, then it's off to Emergency, because there is a chance that the attack could turn into something more sinister - a heart attack. I have learned to read the signs quite well and know when I am going to have a bad day and need to take it easy. Since then I have also been diagnosed with Neurocardiogenic Syncope, Vertigo, Gastritis and just recently Depression.

There have been many struggles going on that I have been trying my best to deal with, it hasn't been easy for the most part.

I no longer am working as a teacher, I lost my job because of my health, but in a way, I'm glad that I did, working for your ex-husband's new wife is not the ideal situation to be in. Trying to keep personal and work lives separated is a hard task and it just wasn't working. There were too many things going on to warrant it being a happy workplace for either of us. So in a way, my health decline was a blessing in disguise, it not only gave me a wake up call, but also got me out of a very uncomfortable situation.

Needless to say, money is definitely a lot tighter these days.

Our little terrier, Missy, has recently been diagnosed with health problems of her own. After years of being told that her gag reflex was failing and watching her struggle to drink and keep it down and have energy to anything, we finally found a vet that did the proper testing and it was found that she actually has Congestive Heart Failure. If it was treated earlier, the symptoms wouldn't have become as bad as they were. We were at the point that we actually thought that we were going to lose her.
Since her diagnosis and being put on the right medication, she is like a new dog. She's full of energy and just about back to her old self. Apart from the fact that she is 11 years old, is blind in one eye and almost deaf, she's doing really well. It's such a relief for us to see her happy again.
The medication is expensive, but are making ends meet and making sure that she has what she needs, her health is more important than our finances.


My son and daughter-in-law have moved out of mum's house. Their new home is finally finished and they moved 4 weeks ago, so we (or I should say, mostly hubby) has been working flat out to get the garden cleaned up and the painting, etc done. We're just waiting on the kids to come in and finish removing the last of their things and clean the house and then it's up for sale.

Mum's House

We had a visit with an agent on Tuesday afternoon and he seems to think it will sell really well. I'm hoping so, considering all the turmoil that has been caused by my brothers over the whole thing. But that's a story for another day, if I choose to tell it.

With a bit of luck the house will be up on the market next week and fingers crossed, it sells quickly.
It's a very bittersweet feeling to have to let it go. Mum adored her "little house" and was so happy there, she always told me it was the best decision she ever made. So many happy memories were made there.

Once the house has sold, I have decided that I am going to get myself a new kitchen out of my share of the estate. Mum was a great cook, it was the one thing she loved to do the most and her cooking was known by everyone. Every birthday she would bake a cake, at Christmas there would be Christmas cakes being made for friends and family. She was the Christmas Pudding queen. I remember most of my childhood years spent around Christmas time, dodging plum puddings hanging to dry in the laundry. I have her faithful pudding bowl and spoon here, they are well worn and definitely past their use-by dates, but they hold so many memories, so they will be on display in my new kitchen. The kitchen will be my place that I can feel close to mum, a place where I can re-create all her favourite recipes from her worn exercise book and use her utensils that I inherited and hopefully make new memories with future generations of our family.

Nothing will ever taste as good as my mother's sponge cake! 

It's been a tough time for me, finally getting around to cleaning out the house properly and knowing that in the future, the house will no longer have the connection it does now and a new family will be living in it, making new memories.

I haven't even picked up my crochet hook for the past couple of weeks. I have projects started but nothing done with them. I just haven't had the incentive to do any of it. I'm hoping that my cro-jo hasn't disappeared completely, because I really do love working with yarn and creating beautiful things. Maybe once things settle down, I will be more settled within myself and be able to get back to it.

Through all of this, there has been one constant in my life, my husband. He has been there beside me every step of the way. There's been some really rough spots for him and I'm so glad that he decided to just try and brush them off and get me back on track. He has been my rock and I feel so lucky to have him in my life. Without him, I have no idea how I would have coped in recent times, if he wasn't around. I don't think he realises just how much I truly do love and appreciate him.

I'll try and keep things updated more regularly here from now on, I can't make any promises other than, I'll try....let's see how that goes.....

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